How to tell your ex youre dating someone new, initiating the conversation
Thank your ex for his time and part company as friendly as possible.
Be considerate and respectful so that your interaction remains calm and cooperative. Keep your end of the bargain with the rules you agreed on.
Your relationship will probably have fewer bumps if he learns it directly from you. You want to inform your ex, since you and he share the responsibility of raising your children together.
Deal, a licensed marriage and family therapist in Arkansas, and cited on SmartStepfamilies. When you begin dating, your ex wants to make certain that anyone who has contact with the children you and he share is a safe person for the kids.
If you have a friendly relationship, call him up and ask that you sit down together to talk. Agree to revisit the subject if the relationship becomes more serious and you are ready to introduce this person to your kids.
How to Tell An Ex-Spouse You're Dating
Make sure your motives are pure and that you are not trying to seek revenge or hurt him. Telling him you are dating makes reality set in.
If your ex annoys you during the conversation, remind yourself that the goal is cooperation and positive communication. Keep this conversation business-like.
Tell him first if you are going to introduce your children to someone new. You will do everything you can to minimize the effect your new guy has on them.
Initiating the Conversation How you initiate the conversation with your ex depends on what type of relationship you have. It is better that he hears from you that you are dating, rather than from a mutual friend or your children.
Be Sensitive and Respectful Set aside any unresolved feelings you have about your ex. Prepare what you are going to say and keep to the facts. Ask your ex if she has suggestions about guidelines such as not including the new girlfriend in family Accommodating inns, no sleepovers while the kids are there and limited public displays of affection.
Reassure your ex that you will not introduce your children to any dates unless there is long-term potential.